The Boogie Monster

Repairing Relationships

Becoming a dad has been one of the greatest blessings I’ve ever received, but like most blessings, there come responsibilities and new lessons learned. We are constantly screening what types of shows we watch on TV, working out the context of our conversations, and teaching a two-year-old the tough things in life, like drinking milk from a bowl, especially from a bowl of Fruity Pebbles cereal.

Looking at these building moments through adult eyes, I like to call the tough things the Boogie Monster.  As we mold habits, work on dependency from the pacifier, share, help our child to blow her nose and her actually allow us to clean her nose, the Boogie Monster can become an enemy.  As a parent I have seen this enemy appear in other forms and creep into our everyday lives. There may be disagreements over dirty clothes, whose turn it is to wash the dishes, fold the clothes, cut the lawn, and my favorite, deciding where to eat.  It’s almost comical, but I’m pretty sure most can relate. 

Unfortunately, in recent events while out to dinner, I allowed this enemy to steal the happiness of the evening, kill the joy of fellowship, and destroy the potential witness for other families to encounter how the Lord allows us to be used for his glory in everyday moments.  All it took was one ill-considered and foolhardy comment, “Don’t tell me what to do.”

Believing I knew what was best for our two-year-old Charlie, I attempted to clean what I thought was an unappealing “boogie” from her nose as we sat with others at dinner.   My wife Laura was holding Charlie, who struggled while Laura and I were trying to clean her nose.  I had nearly finished removing the slimy inconsiderate monster, but the culprit was hanging on to Charlie’s nose for dear life.  Then Laura said, “Stop messing with her nose and leave it be.” That’s when it happened. I replied, “Don’t tell me what to do.” Oh, yea, it was as bad then as it is now as you read it!

            “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.”  (ESV, John 10:10)  In an instant, I allowed the adult Boogie Monster to steal, kill, and destroy what the Lord was building all weekend. In a flash, POOF! No joy, no happiness, no witness for the Lord at the table.  The ride home… AWKWARD, with me wondering what to do.

            The best option during that moment was gone.  It was in the past, but better options were still available.  

            Repent!  Get back on path.  Mistakes happen, and we may momentarily give leverage to the enemy.  Regain it.

           Reevaluate!  Think about it (but don’t live there) .

           Acknowledge failure.

           Ask for mercy and forgiveness.  “Have mercy on me, O God, according to your steadfast love; according to your abundant mercy blot out my transgressions.”   (ESV, Psalm 51:1)

           Accept grace.

           Focus on Christ!  He can open the doors of communication.  “He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake.”  (ESV, Psalm 23:3)

           Move forward.  If doing so involves apologies, then apologize.  Focusing on Christ is about reconciliation – the gospel.  The entire reason and sole purpose, or should I say soul purpose, in Christ’s coming is to reconcile our relationships, first with Him, secondly with one another.  

No matter the duds or attire… casual dress, business suit, trade uniform, military/police/first responder, school uniforms or scrubs…the Boogie Monster impedes us all.

“Hear, my son, your father’s instruction, and forsake not your mother’s teaching, for they are a graceful garland for your head and pendants for your neck.” (ESV, Proverbs 1:8-9)