People Pleaser

I grew up being a “people pleaser.” You know those kids… they hate to make the teacher have to fuss. They don’t like to upset their parents with bad behavior. They don’t want to let their friends down at school. Then those kids grow up to be adults who are not good at saying “no” when someone asks them to help out on a weeknight once a week or who aim to please those around them in order to avoid conflict. They are the wives who feel like they have to have the house in perfect order every evening. They are the moms and dads who feel pressured to make a “perfect” life for their children. They are the employees who work past the clock just to perfect the assignment their boss gave them. None of those things are bad, but they can result in our focus shifting away from Christ. We call those people “people pleasers,” and, unfortunately, most days I am one.

“For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.” (Galatians 1:10 ESV) Raise your hand if that verse makes you shrug your shoulders at times. (I’m raising both hands over here). I’ve written this scripture on my mirror, on my desk at work, and even made it a background on my phone before. I struggle with this almost daily. I don’t know why it’s so hard for me to remember that I’m here to please God, not people, but it is. Daily I have to remind myself of this and ask God to show me how to step back and make Him my focus.

I’ve been so burdened over the last few months about this verse. In many situations, I have to ask myself that question: Am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? It gets me every time, because a lot of times, I’m trying to please the people around me because I don’t like for people to be upset. But how does that affect me eternally? The verse clearly states that “if I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.” I’ve questioned it a lot… so does that mean I’m not supposed to do things that please people at all?

Like I said, I don’t like for people to be upset with me or to feel let down because I had to say “no,” but if I’m living only to please people, I’ve missed it in the long run. I’ve missed the whole point of this Christian life. And quite frankly, I don’t want to be in that situation at all. None of us do. So how do we put this into perspective?

Over the past few months, I’ve been asking God to help me be a faithful follower of Him. When we shift our focus on Him, He is glorified. When we make pleasing Him our purpose in life, the people around us will be pleased because we will be working as one body for Christ. Instead of being a “people pleaser,” I pray that I would be a Christ follower whose aim is to please the Most High King. He loves us, and He is pleased with us when we follow Him.

Daily I have to remind myself that the dishes can wait, the papers can stay on the desk for an extra day, and I can say “no” to doing extra activities. Sure, people may get their feelings hurt at times, and it may be inconvenient at times, but unless I’m doing those things to please God, too, it can wait.

You may be like me, and that may be a verse that you’ve struggled with. If that’s the case, you’re not alone. We must realize that our focus should be on Christ and making Him known. We may be saying “no” to something so that we can say “yes” to something even better. Be encouraged today that being a servant of Christ is enough. He is pleased with us when we follow and serve Him. Let’s shift our mindset away from being a “people-pleaser” and back to being a Christ follower.