Sunday, March 31st, 2013, is a day that I will never forget. It was a day that changed the trajectory of my family’s future. You see, March 31st was a great day! This was the day that I surrendered to ministry before my home church. I knew I was in God’s will and obeying His command. However, I could never have predicted how the next six years would look.
Later that year, Kerri and I quit our jobs and began our journey to Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary. This was a time that I would describe as an all time spiritual high for us as individuals and as a couple. We were so excited for what God had in store.
It was during my second semester of seminary that I began serving as part-time youth pastor in Roanoke, Texas. The church was a small contemporary Southern Baptist church. Wednesday night youth services averaged twenty students when we arrived. However, during our three year tenure, we experienced great growth. After three years, there were over forty students on Wednesday night, and we had witnessed twenty-three students come to faith in Jesus Christ and/or get baptized. What an amazing testimony to what God can do!
Over the next year, I was enrolled in seminary classes that pushed me to my limits. These were the hardest classes I had ever dreamed of taking. During that year, I was called to be full-time student pastor in Natchitoches, Louisiana. I would complete my final year of seminary both as a full-time student and full-time student pastor. While we had experienced a hilltop high, we never knew how deep the valley could become. In fact, we thought the hilltop we had experienced was a normal ministry experience.
The truth is that everyone’s valley looks different. Jacob feared for his life when he was going to meet his brother Esau. Joseph was sold into slavery by his brothers. Daniel was thrown into the lion’s den. Jonah was swallowed by a big fish. Peter denied Jesus three times in his valley. The point is that throughout Scripture, people hit all time lows, and everyone’s low was different.
For me, my valley was when life became my idol. You see, trying to be the perfect student, student pastor, husband and dad became an idol. As a full-time student and full-time minister, I wasn’t managing my time well, and spiritually I hit a low. It was one of the driest seasons of my life. I felt alone and believed I was falling short on every target. Meanwhile, within a two month period, both my car and our apartment were broken into. My focus began to blur, and I began to doubt my decisions and even my calling. I was so focused on myself that this valley completely distorted my view.
At one moment, I began to seek God and His plan. I began praying that above all else, God would just help me to be faithful in my calling. My mindset changed. It was no longer about being the perfect student, student pastor, husband and dad. My mindset became focused on being a faithful husband, dad, student, and student pastor. Not only did my goal change, but my priorities changed.
If we aren’t careful, we begin to make life an idol. Our status, our career, our family all become idols. When we do that, our valleys become focused on self rather than on God.
Earlier this year, I preached my first funeral. For the service, I preached from Psalm 23, a very common funeral text. However, in my study of this passage, something new occurred to me. This passage is about the journey through life, walking with God.
Psalm 23:1-4 English Standard Version
“The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.”
What I have learned is that if we land in our valley and choose not to focus on God, we will never get out of that valley. However, if our focus is on staying faithful to God and trusting Him, then we will have peace in the valley and begin the climb out.
My encouragement to all is to simply cling to God and seek faithfulness as you travel through the valley because the hilltop is coming! All of life is meant to honor God both through the hills and valleys!
Matthew 6:33 English Standard Version
“But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.”