Wilderness Wandering

I have a sweet friend who said, “I’m dry, and I know it. I keep asking the Lord to bring me out of this wilderness. I tell him, ‘Lord, I’m ready. I’m tired of wandering. I’m just ready to be done.’” I thought about what she said for a long time. 

I deeply understand what she’s saying. I have spent a good bit of my Christian walk wandering in the dry land of the wilderness, placing one foot in front of the other, trying to work out my faith with fear and trembling, but barely managing to get by some days. I have felt that God was far away some days, battled temptation and sin some days, walked in pride some days, and tried to be in control some days. Often, I have barely managed to move forward instead of walking in circles. How uncomfortable the wilderness wandering has been. Warring within myself, wanting “comfort” and often finding none. But God.

 Deuteronomy 8:2-10 (ESV) says,

“2 And you shall remember the whole way that the Lord your God has led you these forty years in the wilderness, that he might humble you, testing you to know what was in your heart, whether you would keep his commandments or not. 3 And he humbled you and let you hunger and fed you with manna, which you did not know, nor did your fathers know, that he might make you know that man does not live by bread alone, but man lives by every word[a] that comes from the mouth of the Lord. 4 Your clothing did not wear out on you and your foot did not swell these forty years. 5 Know then in your heart that, as a man disciplines his son, the Lord your God disciplines you. 6 So you shall keep the commandments of the Lord your God by walking in his ways and by fearing him. 7 For the Lord your God is bringing you into a good land, a land of brooks of water, of fountains and springs, flowing out in the valleys and hills, 8 a land of wheat and barley, of vines and fig trees and pomegranates, a land of olive trees and honey, 9 a land in which you will eat bread without scarcity, in which you will lack nothing, a land whose stones are iron, and out of whose hills you can dig copper. 10 And you shall eat and be full, and you shall bless the Lord your God for the good land he has given you.”

Whew. “Every word” means “commandment.”  We are to walk by the command and direction of God. What if the wilderness wandering was a gift? What if the wilderness and the discipline God dealt me there was preparing me for a greater future joy in Him? What if God had not only allowed it for the death of my sin and pride and the learning of trust, but also sanctioned it for my good and His Glory? 

My view of wilderness wandering began to shift, and I began to praise God in it and dig into the Word about it, looking for instruction from God on how to walk in the dry land. 

And in my searching of the Word, like always, I found Jesus. 

In the Gospels, (Luke 4:1-13 and Matthew 4:1-11), Jesus identified with us in our wilderness wandering. Notice He was led by the Spirit into the literal wilderness, fasting and hungry, tempted powerfully by Satan. 

Only, Jesus didn’t sin. 

Instead, He provided us with a template to be victorious in our own wilderness wandering, and to prepare us for ministry. Isn’t that beautiful? We don’t have to guess at how we should press on. We have the ultimate wilderness manual. Jesus relied on the Word of God to defend Himself and waited on God to provide His needs, even though He himself could’ve called provision down from heaven with one breath. Jesus showed us that deep hunger can be filled only by provision from God and that no counterfeit Satan could bring would ever compare, no matter how tempting. 

Most of us will not live the majority of our Christian lives on the mountain top, basking in the glow of the Holy Spirit. Most of us will learn perseverance, long-suffering, patience and actual joy IN the wilderness.

I’m so thankful that the sovereignty of God allows for the wilderness wandering not to be wasted, but to be preparation for when the sun shines again and the blessings flow, so that we will be humbled to remember that every good and perfect gift comes from the Lord.